How to Put Passion Back Into Lovemaking
Admit that your lovemaking is not what it used to be., Make sure your sex life is the only problem., Communicate about your problems in the bedroom.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Admit that your lovemaking is not what it used to be.
When you first started seeing your honey, you couldn't keep your hands off of each other or go more than a few hours without getting frisky.
But now that you've been together for five years, your love making is about as inspiring as a TV dinner.
Here are some signs that you and your special someone are having trouble in the sack:
When you can't remember the last time you had sex.
If it takes you more than a few moments to remember the last time you had sex, chances are that it's been way too long, or that it was so unmemorable that you literally forgot about it.
When you've stopped grooming yourself in anticipation for sex.
Ladies, if you used to shave your legs every morning and now are going weeks without a good shave, it may be a sign that you're not getting enough action, or that you don't care as much about it when you do.
And gentlemen, if you no longer make an effort to smell and feel clean, it may be a sign that you don't care what happens in the bedroom.
If having sex is just another thing on your "to-do" list.
If you're happy after you've had sex because you've accomplished another task for the day and can move on to the next chore, it's a sign that you don't see it as something fun and hot, but as just another part of your routine.
If you just aren't turned on by your significant other anymore.
This is one of the worst signs, but fear not! Unless this is a permanent condition, it can be addressed with some future sexiness.
If sex is something you dread. -
Step 2: Make sure your sex life is the only problem.
Sometimes your lackluster situation in the sack is just part of the natural evolution of a relationship, but this may not be the only issue.
Before you try to put passion back into lovemaking, you need to make sure that you have a strong relationship otherwise.
Here are some signs that there are bigger problems in your relationship than your lack of sex drive:
If you feel very distant from your loved one.
If you and your loved one stop sharing your intimate thoughts and worries, or if you just feel like you don't know what your significant other has been up to all week, you may be drifting apart.
If your boyfriend walks into the apartment you share and you ask yourself, "Who is this person?" your problem may be more than just a lack of passion.
If you find yourself fantasizing about other people---and never your significant other.
If you're routinely turned on by strangers, other people of the opposite sex you know, or just hotties on television, but you never think of making love to your significant other unless it's happening, this may be a sign that you're just not that into each other anymore.
If you find yourselves fighting and being unhappy more often than not.
Though all good relationships take work, if nothing you're doing is working and you're generally miserable with the person you're with and happier by yourself, then no amount of stellar sex can fix the bigger picture. , If you truly do care about your significant other and want him or her to be a part of your life forever, then it's time to have a talk.
If the rest of your relationship is healthy, then your lines of communication should be open, and having a conversation about the situation is the first step to improving it, even if it's a little awkward.
Here's how to start:
Be casual but firm.
There's no need to scare your cutie by saying you want to have "a really serious talk," but be firm about the fact that you have something to discuss with him or her.
Say, "There's something I want to talk to you about." Pick a time when he or she is busy and free from stress to discuss it.
Assure your sweetie that you still love him, but that this is something you want to work on.
Once you both agree that your relationship needs more passion, you can discuss some of the reasons for why it's happening.
Are you taking each other for granted? Are you both so busy that sex hasn't been a priority? Are you both too stressed out to even think about it? Whatever the problem is, discussing it together is a first step to solving it. -
Step 3: Communicate about your problems in the bedroom.
Detailed Guide
When you first started seeing your honey, you couldn't keep your hands off of each other or go more than a few hours without getting frisky.
But now that you've been together for five years, your love making is about as inspiring as a TV dinner.
Here are some signs that you and your special someone are having trouble in the sack:
When you can't remember the last time you had sex.
If it takes you more than a few moments to remember the last time you had sex, chances are that it's been way too long, or that it was so unmemorable that you literally forgot about it.
When you've stopped grooming yourself in anticipation for sex.
Ladies, if you used to shave your legs every morning and now are going weeks without a good shave, it may be a sign that you're not getting enough action, or that you don't care as much about it when you do.
And gentlemen, if you no longer make an effort to smell and feel clean, it may be a sign that you don't care what happens in the bedroom.
If having sex is just another thing on your "to-do" list.
If you're happy after you've had sex because you've accomplished another task for the day and can move on to the next chore, it's a sign that you don't see it as something fun and hot, but as just another part of your routine.
If you just aren't turned on by your significant other anymore.
This is one of the worst signs, but fear not! Unless this is a permanent condition, it can be addressed with some future sexiness.
If sex is something you dread.
Sometimes your lackluster situation in the sack is just part of the natural evolution of a relationship, but this may not be the only issue.
Before you try to put passion back into lovemaking, you need to make sure that you have a strong relationship otherwise.
Here are some signs that there are bigger problems in your relationship than your lack of sex drive:
If you feel very distant from your loved one.
If you and your loved one stop sharing your intimate thoughts and worries, or if you just feel like you don't know what your significant other has been up to all week, you may be drifting apart.
If your boyfriend walks into the apartment you share and you ask yourself, "Who is this person?" your problem may be more than just a lack of passion.
If you find yourself fantasizing about other people---and never your significant other.
If you're routinely turned on by strangers, other people of the opposite sex you know, or just hotties on television, but you never think of making love to your significant other unless it's happening, this may be a sign that you're just not that into each other anymore.
If you find yourselves fighting and being unhappy more often than not.
Though all good relationships take work, if nothing you're doing is working and you're generally miserable with the person you're with and happier by yourself, then no amount of stellar sex can fix the bigger picture. , If you truly do care about your significant other and want him or her to be a part of your life forever, then it's time to have a talk.
If the rest of your relationship is healthy, then your lines of communication should be open, and having a conversation about the situation is the first step to improving it, even if it's a little awkward.
Here's how to start:
Be casual but firm.
There's no need to scare your cutie by saying you want to have "a really serious talk," but be firm about the fact that you have something to discuss with him or her.
Say, "There's something I want to talk to you about." Pick a time when he or she is busy and free from stress to discuss it.
Assure your sweetie that you still love him, but that this is something you want to work on.
Once you both agree that your relationship needs more passion, you can discuss some of the reasons for why it's happening.
Are you taking each other for granted? Are you both so busy that sex hasn't been a priority? Are you both too stressed out to even think about it? Whatever the problem is, discussing it together is a first step to solving it.
About the Author
Hannah Burns
Specializes in breaking down complex practical skills topics into simple steps.
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