How to Turn Down Advice from a Relative Who Is a Therapist

Step-by-Step Guide

1. 1

   Step 1: Be polite.

   You may respect your relative and their advice but still want to say no.
   
   Say, “Thank you, I’ll think about that” as a way acknowledge yet not weigh in on their advice.
   
   You can also say, “That’s a good idea and I’ll decide whether that’s right for me.” This statement recognizes their advice as good, yet not necessarily right for you.There’s no need to be rude or say that their advice is bad or wrong.
2. 2

   Step 2: Be firm.

   If the advice is inappropriate or not wanted, let your relative know this in a firm and unwavering way.
   
   Make it clear you do not wish to discuss it and that the advice needs to end.You may wish to share your feelings or experiences, but firmly say you do not want advice.
   
   Perhaps your relative has some relationship advice for you and you are not asking people to weigh in.
   
   Say, “I’m not asking for advice at this time” or, “I respect your knowledge and your willingness to help, but right now is not a good time for me to receive this advice.
   
   When I am ready, I will come to you.” , Often, this type of advice comes from a good place and is meant to be helpful.
   
   Your relative may have a clinical specialty and want to help you.
   
   If it’s given without you asking, it’s okay to not accept the advice, even if it’s expert advice.
   
   Whatever your reaction, thank them for thinking of you.You can say a simple, “Thank you for thinking of me” and leave it at that. , If you tend to accept your relative’s advice but are choosing not to this time, it can be trickier to say no.
   
   Especially if you respect your relative’s opinion and advice, an occasional no thank you can be difficult to deliver.
   
   You may be firm in your no or unsure about it.
   
   Either way, don’t be afraid to turn the advice down this time, even if you’ve taken the advice every other time.
   
   Say, “I appreciate the advice you give me regularly and I’ve found it to be really helpful over time.
   
   Thanks for the advice on how to treat my depression.
   
   At this time, I’m thinking about treating it a different way, but I’ll keep this in mind.” Keep in mind that most good therapists know that all they can do is offer advice and it is up to the recipient to act on it.
   
   Also, remember that you have the right to accept or ignore advice.
3. 3

   Step 3: Thank them.

4. 4

   Step 4: Say no even if you usually agree.

Detailed Guide

About the Author