How to Cope with Divorce As a Child
Express your feelings however you need to., Avoid unhealthy coping., Confide in someone you trust., Talk to kids with divorced parents., Express your feelings in a constructive way., Don’t blame yourself.
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Express your feelings however you need to.
Coping with your parent’s divorce brings up many feelings.
It is perfectly normal to feel hurt, upset, angry, sad, or confused.
Plus, these emotions may change from day to day.
Everyone goes through a wide range of emotions during this time.
Don’t judge yourself or think that something is wrong with you.
There is no right or wrong way to feel.
You can cry, shout, holler, go silent, etc., as you see fit.
Your feelings are real and you need to express them in your own way.
If anyone tells you to "man up" or to "grow up"
realize such advice is wrong, even if meant well.
It is perfectly okay for you to cry, scream into a pillow, or punch your bed if it is your way of letting out your emotions and frustrations. -
Step 2: Avoid unhealthy coping.
Make sure to choose healthy coping strategies.
You may be tempted to act out in inappropriate ways, such as stealing, fighting, or using drugs and alcohol.
But this will not change the reality--these behaviors will only make things worse for you.
Be sure to call a friend, go for a walk, or write in your journal instead of engaging in unhealthy activities., Talking to someone else can be a great way to express how you feel about the divorce.
You may go to a best friend, a sibling, another adult family member, a teacher, or a school counselor.
Choose someone who is a good listener and is supportive of your needs.You might start the conversation off by saying, “My parents are getting a divorce and I don’t know what to think.” , What better way to get your feelings out and be heard by someone who understands what you’re going through? If you have a friend or classmate whose parents have gone through a divorce, seek them out.
They were new to this thing once, just like you are now.
They may have some advice on how to cope with all the new changes.
Say something along the lines of, “Hey, Craig, I know your parents broke up last year.
Mine are going through a divorce now.
How did you deal with all this?” , You might write poetry, songs, stories, or entries in your journal as an outlet for your feelings.
You can also use other creative activities to deal you’re your emotions, like painting, drawing, dancing, listening to music, playing with your dog or playing sports.Dedicate at least 30 minutes each day to a constructive activity. , For whatever reason, your parents made this decision, not you.
It is not your fault! It was an issue between your parents that caused the divorce, not you or your siblings.
The decision is about their own relationship with each other and a belief that they can no longer get along as a couple.Remember, they will always be your parents, no matter if they are married or not. -
Step 3: Confide in someone you trust.
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Step 4: Talk to kids with divorced parents.
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Step 5: Express your feelings in a constructive way.
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Step 6: Don’t blame yourself.
Detailed Guide
Coping with your parent’s divorce brings up many feelings.
It is perfectly normal to feel hurt, upset, angry, sad, or confused.
Plus, these emotions may change from day to day.
Everyone goes through a wide range of emotions during this time.
Don’t judge yourself or think that something is wrong with you.
There is no right or wrong way to feel.
You can cry, shout, holler, go silent, etc., as you see fit.
Your feelings are real and you need to express them in your own way.
If anyone tells you to "man up" or to "grow up"
realize such advice is wrong, even if meant well.
It is perfectly okay for you to cry, scream into a pillow, or punch your bed if it is your way of letting out your emotions and frustrations.
Make sure to choose healthy coping strategies.
You may be tempted to act out in inappropriate ways, such as stealing, fighting, or using drugs and alcohol.
But this will not change the reality--these behaviors will only make things worse for you.
Be sure to call a friend, go for a walk, or write in your journal instead of engaging in unhealthy activities., Talking to someone else can be a great way to express how you feel about the divorce.
You may go to a best friend, a sibling, another adult family member, a teacher, or a school counselor.
Choose someone who is a good listener and is supportive of your needs.You might start the conversation off by saying, “My parents are getting a divorce and I don’t know what to think.” , What better way to get your feelings out and be heard by someone who understands what you’re going through? If you have a friend or classmate whose parents have gone through a divorce, seek them out.
They were new to this thing once, just like you are now.
They may have some advice on how to cope with all the new changes.
Say something along the lines of, “Hey, Craig, I know your parents broke up last year.
Mine are going through a divorce now.
How did you deal with all this?” , You might write poetry, songs, stories, or entries in your journal as an outlet for your feelings.
You can also use other creative activities to deal you’re your emotions, like painting, drawing, dancing, listening to music, playing with your dog or playing sports.Dedicate at least 30 minutes each day to a constructive activity. , For whatever reason, your parents made this decision, not you.
It is not your fault! It was an issue between your parents that caused the divorce, not you or your siblings.
The decision is about their own relationship with each other and a belief that they can no longer get along as a couple.Remember, they will always be your parents, no matter if they are married or not.
About the Author
Lori Gray
Dedicated to helping readers learn new skills in lifestyle and beyond.
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