How to Have a Successful Blind Date
Choose the person who sets you up wisely., Talk to your date on the phone beforehand., Set a specific start and end time for your date., Pick a public place for your date., Pick a low-key but engaging activity., Wear clothes that make you feel...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Choose the person who sets you up wisely.
If you’re asking someone to set you up, make sure that the person knows you well and, perhaps more importantly, knows what you want in a partner.
Your close friends might have the same social circles as you and might not be able to set you up with anyone new.
Don’t be afraid to ask people you don’t know as well, such as friends of friends, to set you up.
Pick someone who you think would have fun, interesting friends., You will need to communicate with your date beforehand to talk about logistics.
If the person setting you up insists on coordinating logistics, ask to at least chat with the person on the phone for a few minutes with the matchmaker there.
Ask your date a few basic questions, such as where they are from or what they like to do on the weekends.
That way, when you talk to the person on your date, you’ll have one small conversation to reference., Choose a start time that you can make with plenty of leeway.
Choose an end time that leaves time for lingering if you want to keep talking with your date.
Keep it short.
If you like your date, you can always see them again.
A bad date that’s too long is worse than a good date that’s too short!, Restaurants, bars, parks, movie theaters, and mini golf venues are all good examples.
Let a friend know what time you’re leaving and when you’ll be back.
Check in with her at the end of your date so that she knows you’re safe., When deciding what to do, pick something that is easy and stimulates conversation.
Feel free to abandon the “dinner and drinks” mold.Here are some ideas that are more interesting than dinner (but also pair well with dinner, if you are hungry!):
Hiking Mini golf and ice cream Aquarium Jazz club Karaoke bar Canoeing or kayaking Cooking class Dance class, Don’t feel the need to try out a new outfit.
Wear something that you know you like and that you know looks good.
Dress appropriately for the activity you’re doing on your date.
Wear athletic clothes if you’re going hiking or more formal wear if you’re going out to an expensive restaurant., Try not to expect the perfect partner right from the outset.
Your blind date might surprise you in a positive way.
When you think about what you hope to get from your blind date, turn your mind to something else immediately.
Don’t have low or high expectations.
Aim for no expectations instead., Do not stay at your blind date if your date is rude, mean, or otherwise extremely unpleasant.
In the unfortunate case of an emergency, rehearse what you’re going to say.
Maybe your roommate is sick, or your landlord called with an urgent issue regarding your apartment.
It’s good to have an emergency plan in case the date goes horribly awry., Before you leave the house, double check that you’ve put on deodorant, flossed, and fixed your hair.
A little bit of hygiene goes a long way when you’re meeting someone new! , Ask your date questions without “yes” or “no” answers so that they don’t feel like they’re being interrogated.
Get to know your date’s personality and lifestyle.
Does this person seem like someone who shares your goals and complements your personality? See if your date likes the same things that you do, or if your date could introduce you to something you’ve always wanted to try.
Here’s a list of questions to get you started:
What do you like to do on weekends? What is one thing on your bucket list? What’s the best book you’ve read in the past six months? What in your life are you proud of?“What do you do? Do you enjoy your job?” “What is your best friend like?” “Do you want to try some of my food?” “Are you a morning person?” “Do you have roommates? Who are they?” , Give your date realistic information about yourself, your life, your interests, and your thoughts.
Your date is here to get to know you.
Don’t dominate the conversation, but do express yourself as you would in typical conversations with friends or potential partners.
Find connections between your date and yourself., Make eye contact with your date.
Smile.
Practice good posture.
Nod at what the other person is saying.Occasionally, summarize what the other person says and show an interest in the other person’s interests.
For example, you could say, “It sounds like you have a great relationship with your mother! When was the last time you saw her?” Or, “You seem like you really love your job.
How did you get interested in public service?” , Tell your date if you want to see them again.
Get their number and call them within a couple of days.
If you don’t want to see your date again, tell them that you had a nice time and that you hope they have a good rest of their evening.
Don’t be overtly cruel about rejecting someone, but don’t feel as though you have to give them false hope by saying you want to see them again when you don’t. , If you get to your date and find that you’re not attracted to the person at all, don’t bail immediately.
You committed to these short plans and might form a great friendship with the person.
Don’t imply that you want to have a romantic relationship, though.
Say something at the end of the night that implies friendship rather than a romantic relationship.
You could say, “I had a great time tonight and think we could be great friends.” Or try, “I had a nice time tonight.
Enjoy the rest of your weekend!” , Regardless of convention, offer (at the least) to split the bill with your date.
Do not choose an activity or restaurant you can’t afford if you end up paying the entire bill.Here are some ways you can approach that awkward moment when the bill arrives:
Say, “That was delicious.
How do you feel about splitting the check?” Or, “This one’s on me!” Or, if your date offers to pay: “I’m happy to split the bill with you!” Or, if your date insists upon paying: “I’m happy to split the bill, but thank you so much!” , Just because you aren’t talking doesn’t mean a moment is awkward! Feel free to take a few seconds and reflect on what’s happened so far.
If you feel that the silence is awkward, have a backup list of open-ended questions (see above) to ask your date.
The silence is probably much shorter than you think it is., Start thinking about that dreaded end-of-date moment before it actually happens.
Do you want a handshake, a hug, a kiss? Read, too, the signals that your date gives you throughout the date.
Does your date sit close to you, or do they seem like they’re in a hurry to leave? Whatever happens at the end of the date should be something you’re both comfortable with.If your date makes an unwanted advance, just step away and say no.
You don’t owe your date any physical contact.
If you accidentally make an unwanted advance on your date, don’t panic.
Apologize for reading the situation incorrectly and continue talking with your date. -
Step 2: Talk to your date on the phone beforehand.
-
Step 3: Set a specific start and end time for your date.
-
Step 4: Pick a public place for your date.
-
Step 5: Pick a low-key but engaging activity.
-
Step 6: Wear clothes that make you feel comfortable and confident.
-
Step 7: Drop all expectations.
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Step 8: Think of an emergency escape plan.
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Step 9: Remember good hygiene.
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Step 10: Ask open-ended questions about your date.
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Step 11: Talk about yourself.
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Step 12: Practice active listening skills.
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Step 13: Be honest about next steps.
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Step 14: Don’t run away from an unattractive date.
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Step 15: Offer to pay or split the bill.
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Step 16: Don’t panic during awkward silences.
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Step 17: Read both yourself and your date for cues about the end of the night.
Detailed Guide
If you’re asking someone to set you up, make sure that the person knows you well and, perhaps more importantly, knows what you want in a partner.
Your close friends might have the same social circles as you and might not be able to set you up with anyone new.
Don’t be afraid to ask people you don’t know as well, such as friends of friends, to set you up.
Pick someone who you think would have fun, interesting friends., You will need to communicate with your date beforehand to talk about logistics.
If the person setting you up insists on coordinating logistics, ask to at least chat with the person on the phone for a few minutes with the matchmaker there.
Ask your date a few basic questions, such as where they are from or what they like to do on the weekends.
That way, when you talk to the person on your date, you’ll have one small conversation to reference., Choose a start time that you can make with plenty of leeway.
Choose an end time that leaves time for lingering if you want to keep talking with your date.
Keep it short.
If you like your date, you can always see them again.
A bad date that’s too long is worse than a good date that’s too short!, Restaurants, bars, parks, movie theaters, and mini golf venues are all good examples.
Let a friend know what time you’re leaving and when you’ll be back.
Check in with her at the end of your date so that she knows you’re safe., When deciding what to do, pick something that is easy and stimulates conversation.
Feel free to abandon the “dinner and drinks” mold.Here are some ideas that are more interesting than dinner (but also pair well with dinner, if you are hungry!):
Hiking Mini golf and ice cream Aquarium Jazz club Karaoke bar Canoeing or kayaking Cooking class Dance class, Don’t feel the need to try out a new outfit.
Wear something that you know you like and that you know looks good.
Dress appropriately for the activity you’re doing on your date.
Wear athletic clothes if you’re going hiking or more formal wear if you’re going out to an expensive restaurant., Try not to expect the perfect partner right from the outset.
Your blind date might surprise you in a positive way.
When you think about what you hope to get from your blind date, turn your mind to something else immediately.
Don’t have low or high expectations.
Aim for no expectations instead., Do not stay at your blind date if your date is rude, mean, or otherwise extremely unpleasant.
In the unfortunate case of an emergency, rehearse what you’re going to say.
Maybe your roommate is sick, or your landlord called with an urgent issue regarding your apartment.
It’s good to have an emergency plan in case the date goes horribly awry., Before you leave the house, double check that you’ve put on deodorant, flossed, and fixed your hair.
A little bit of hygiene goes a long way when you’re meeting someone new! , Ask your date questions without “yes” or “no” answers so that they don’t feel like they’re being interrogated.
Get to know your date’s personality and lifestyle.
Does this person seem like someone who shares your goals and complements your personality? See if your date likes the same things that you do, or if your date could introduce you to something you’ve always wanted to try.
Here’s a list of questions to get you started:
What do you like to do on weekends? What is one thing on your bucket list? What’s the best book you’ve read in the past six months? What in your life are you proud of?“What do you do? Do you enjoy your job?” “What is your best friend like?” “Do you want to try some of my food?” “Are you a morning person?” “Do you have roommates? Who are they?” , Give your date realistic information about yourself, your life, your interests, and your thoughts.
Your date is here to get to know you.
Don’t dominate the conversation, but do express yourself as you would in typical conversations with friends or potential partners.
Find connections between your date and yourself., Make eye contact with your date.
Smile.
Practice good posture.
Nod at what the other person is saying.Occasionally, summarize what the other person says and show an interest in the other person’s interests.
For example, you could say, “It sounds like you have a great relationship with your mother! When was the last time you saw her?” Or, “You seem like you really love your job.
How did you get interested in public service?” , Tell your date if you want to see them again.
Get their number and call them within a couple of days.
If you don’t want to see your date again, tell them that you had a nice time and that you hope they have a good rest of their evening.
Don’t be overtly cruel about rejecting someone, but don’t feel as though you have to give them false hope by saying you want to see them again when you don’t. , If you get to your date and find that you’re not attracted to the person at all, don’t bail immediately.
You committed to these short plans and might form a great friendship with the person.
Don’t imply that you want to have a romantic relationship, though.
Say something at the end of the night that implies friendship rather than a romantic relationship.
You could say, “I had a great time tonight and think we could be great friends.” Or try, “I had a nice time tonight.
Enjoy the rest of your weekend!” , Regardless of convention, offer (at the least) to split the bill with your date.
Do not choose an activity or restaurant you can’t afford if you end up paying the entire bill.Here are some ways you can approach that awkward moment when the bill arrives:
Say, “That was delicious.
How do you feel about splitting the check?” Or, “This one’s on me!” Or, if your date offers to pay: “I’m happy to split the bill with you!” Or, if your date insists upon paying: “I’m happy to split the bill, but thank you so much!” , Just because you aren’t talking doesn’t mean a moment is awkward! Feel free to take a few seconds and reflect on what’s happened so far.
If you feel that the silence is awkward, have a backup list of open-ended questions (see above) to ask your date.
The silence is probably much shorter than you think it is., Start thinking about that dreaded end-of-date moment before it actually happens.
Do you want a handshake, a hug, a kiss? Read, too, the signals that your date gives you throughout the date.
Does your date sit close to you, or do they seem like they’re in a hurry to leave? Whatever happens at the end of the date should be something you’re both comfortable with.If your date makes an unwanted advance, just step away and say no.
You don’t owe your date any physical contact.
If you accidentally make an unwanted advance on your date, don’t panic.
Apologize for reading the situation incorrectly and continue talking with your date.
About the Author
Heather Cooper
With a background in sports and recreation, Heather Cooper brings 14 years of hands-on experience to every article. Heather believes in making complex topics accessible to everyone.
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