How to Forgive Someone Who Hasn't Forgiven You
Stop viewing this as a blame game., Realize that you cannot make anyone feel something you want them to feel., Be genuine when you express forgiveness., Think about what matters., If you have a history with this person, remember all the good things...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Stop viewing this as a blame game.
If you're waiting for the other person to offer forgiveness first, then you will likely be waiting a long time.
Ironically, it's probable that you're maintaining the reason for a lack of forgiveness, in that it's competitive or about proving you're right after all.
You'll need to step back and remove the blame aspect of it. -
Step 2: Realize that you cannot make anyone feel something you want them to feel.
If they are not ready to express forgiveness and you're already at that point, you'll need to accept that you're simply more advanced in being ready to forgive.
Forgiveness is not something you can force, it's a choice that a person needs to reach personally.
No other person can force this out. , If you aren't genuinely sorry, it'll be obvious and you won't be able to get past the fact that the other person hasn't yet forgiven you. , Does being right or being forgiven matter more than you being the bigger person and letting go of your own resentment, anger or irritation about whatever happened? Have a good think through of what is really stopping you from performing an act of forgiveness. , These are memories that show you that you shared special times together at one time.
Perhaps now these can help you to feel ready to forgive and move on. , Forgiveness isn't tit for tat or reciprocal round robin.
You must make the choice that you are ready to forgive and not take into account whether or not the other person is ready, capable or intending to forgive.
This is about your release from festering or living in the past, not their willingness. , If forgiveness is one of your values, rely on this as your motivation for moving on rather than on worrying about the unforgiving person's morals, values and preferences. -
Step 3: Be genuine when you express forgiveness.
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Step 4: Think about what matters.
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Step 5: If you have a history with this person
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Step 6: remember all the good things and the good times.
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Step 7: Make the choice to forgive.
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Step 8: Focus on your values.
Detailed Guide
If you're waiting for the other person to offer forgiveness first, then you will likely be waiting a long time.
Ironically, it's probable that you're maintaining the reason for a lack of forgiveness, in that it's competitive or about proving you're right after all.
You'll need to step back and remove the blame aspect of it.
If they are not ready to express forgiveness and you're already at that point, you'll need to accept that you're simply more advanced in being ready to forgive.
Forgiveness is not something you can force, it's a choice that a person needs to reach personally.
No other person can force this out. , If you aren't genuinely sorry, it'll be obvious and you won't be able to get past the fact that the other person hasn't yet forgiven you. , Does being right or being forgiven matter more than you being the bigger person and letting go of your own resentment, anger or irritation about whatever happened? Have a good think through of what is really stopping you from performing an act of forgiveness. , These are memories that show you that you shared special times together at one time.
Perhaps now these can help you to feel ready to forgive and move on. , Forgiveness isn't tit for tat or reciprocal round robin.
You must make the choice that you are ready to forgive and not take into account whether or not the other person is ready, capable or intending to forgive.
This is about your release from festering or living in the past, not their willingness. , If forgiveness is one of your values, rely on this as your motivation for moving on rather than on worrying about the unforgiving person's morals, values and preferences.
About the Author
Joe Gomez
Joe Gomez has dedicated 5 years to mastering lifestyle and practical guides. As a content creator, Joe focuses on providing actionable tips and step-by-step guides.
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