How to Make a Good Impression When You Have an Intellectual Disability
Find out the causes of your intellectual disability., Be in the best physical and mental health as you can be., What you can do now, on your own., Find some role models., Avoid answers that seem to be rude., Humor is a sign of intellectual ability...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Find out the causes of your intellectual disability.
Knowing the causes helps to plan ways to overcome or compensate for intellectual disability.
Do you have a brain injury? Might your problems be due to a genetic trait? Are you under stress? Do you have clinical depression? Maybe you do not have any disability; you only feel intellectually inadequate? -
Step 2: Be in the best physical and mental health as you can be.
If you have physiological, medical, psychiatric problems that are holding back your intellectual abilities, get help! Get checkups and tests.
Ask for help from doctors, psychiatrists, counselors, knowledgeable people; read books to understand your condition. , Here are some easy things you can do on your own, without any special tools or materials, to project yourself as an intellectually normal person. , Role models are people who you would like to be similar to.
Watch and listen to people on TV, radio, videos who behave the way you would like to be.
Read books that describe characters that are the way you would like to be.
They are your role models.
It will take a few weeks for you to find role models that you really like.
You can change them, or choose different models for different audiences.
For example, you can have a set of role models for interacting with your friends and family; different role models for people at work and still others for strangers or people you want to impress. , Saying only 'yeah' or 'nah' or 'uh-huh' makes people think you don't understand the topic or have nothing to say, or don't want to talk to them.
Instead, you can say "That's fine," or "I understand," or "I agree" instead of "OK."
People who are witty or ironic are often thought to be intelligent.
Pay attention to what your role models say that are funny or ironic, or how they pick out funny or ironic topics to comment about.
Remember some GOOD JOKES about common topics; make sure not to use any jokes that insults or belittles people. , Pay attention to how your role models use words.
Look up words, phrases and idioms that they use so that you will use correctly.
Using the language incorrectly makes the user sound uneducated or foreign.
But using big or unusual words could make you seem to be an over-compensating pseudo-intellectual, a fake.
Using domain-specific phrases and idioms correctly, such as "a bear market suppresses equity values" for economics or "RBI is a good way to rate a batter" for baseball makes you seem knowledgeable. , Do they start with a very short summary of their point, then add details? Do they start with a description of their thinking such as "This is just an idea..."? Sometimes, intellectual people start with framing statements such as "If we are talking about then..." or "If you agree that..." Practice using the same types of sentences, phrases and idioms that your role models do. , Look at the way your role models carry themselves.
Most likely, they have good posture and hold their heads so that their chins are level with the floor.
They look into the eyes of people they are talking to.
They use gestures to illustrate or add emphasis to what they are saying such as extending an open palm when asking a question.
They project self confidence. , A neutral expression is a good default expression.
A slight smile might let people know that you are friendly and open to connecting with them.
Try to react to what other people are saying with a small nod, tilting your head sideways or smiling, or looking as if you're thinking it over. , Most people love to be paid attention.
When it is your turn to talk, ask a question about something they said such as "You mentioned .
Please tell me more about that." Such a question reassures them that you heard what they said and it gives them another chance to talk. , They don't have to be intellectual topics.
They can be about your hobbies, places you've been, sports, a TV program, a historical event or a current news story.
Prepare up to 5 sentences on a topic so that you are ready when you have to talk.
You can start with "I think is interesting because..." Don't forget to ask questions. , People are interested in other people's lives but make sure your stories are a little bit interesting and not at all embarrassing to you or to other people.
For example, it would NOT be good to say "I have to go to the bathroom every hour." It's very common to tell people about your hometown such as "I grew up in Atlanta so my accent is Southern, not Texan," or "My favorite hobby is..."
The best way to seem intellectually normal is to know what's going on in the world.
You can do this by listening to what your role models and friends are talking about, following people on Twitter, "Liking" Facebook pages on subjects that interest you so you get new stories on that subject, or watching a national newscast, reading the headlines of newspapers or magazines or domain-specific webpages. , Ask some trusted family members or friends, or professional such as counselors to let you know whether what you're doing is working.
Ask them to tell you what you should do more of, less of, or something new that you should consider doing. -
Step 3: What you can do now
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Step 4: on your own.
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Step 5: Find some role models.
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Step 6: Avoid answers that seem to be rude.
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Step 7: Humor is a sign of intellectual ability.
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Step 8: Improve your vocabulary.
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Step 9: Pay attention to how your role models form sentences.
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Step 10: Body language makes a bigger impression than words.
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Step 11: Learn the facial expressions and gestures of your role models.
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Step 12: Ask questions and rephrase what the other person just said.
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Step 13: Prepare some topics on which you can speak well.
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Step 14: Prepare some short stories about yourself.
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Step 15: Be informed.
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Step 16: Get feedback from trusted people.
Detailed Guide
Knowing the causes helps to plan ways to overcome or compensate for intellectual disability.
Do you have a brain injury? Might your problems be due to a genetic trait? Are you under stress? Do you have clinical depression? Maybe you do not have any disability; you only feel intellectually inadequate?
If you have physiological, medical, psychiatric problems that are holding back your intellectual abilities, get help! Get checkups and tests.
Ask for help from doctors, psychiatrists, counselors, knowledgeable people; read books to understand your condition. , Here are some easy things you can do on your own, without any special tools or materials, to project yourself as an intellectually normal person. , Role models are people who you would like to be similar to.
Watch and listen to people on TV, radio, videos who behave the way you would like to be.
Read books that describe characters that are the way you would like to be.
They are your role models.
It will take a few weeks for you to find role models that you really like.
You can change them, or choose different models for different audiences.
For example, you can have a set of role models for interacting with your friends and family; different role models for people at work and still others for strangers or people you want to impress. , Saying only 'yeah' or 'nah' or 'uh-huh' makes people think you don't understand the topic or have nothing to say, or don't want to talk to them.
Instead, you can say "That's fine," or "I understand," or "I agree" instead of "OK."
People who are witty or ironic are often thought to be intelligent.
Pay attention to what your role models say that are funny or ironic, or how they pick out funny or ironic topics to comment about.
Remember some GOOD JOKES about common topics; make sure not to use any jokes that insults or belittles people. , Pay attention to how your role models use words.
Look up words, phrases and idioms that they use so that you will use correctly.
Using the language incorrectly makes the user sound uneducated or foreign.
But using big or unusual words could make you seem to be an over-compensating pseudo-intellectual, a fake.
Using domain-specific phrases and idioms correctly, such as "a bear market suppresses equity values" for economics or "RBI is a good way to rate a batter" for baseball makes you seem knowledgeable. , Do they start with a very short summary of their point, then add details? Do they start with a description of their thinking such as "This is just an idea..."? Sometimes, intellectual people start with framing statements such as "If we are talking about then..." or "If you agree that..." Practice using the same types of sentences, phrases and idioms that your role models do. , Look at the way your role models carry themselves.
Most likely, they have good posture and hold their heads so that their chins are level with the floor.
They look into the eyes of people they are talking to.
They use gestures to illustrate or add emphasis to what they are saying such as extending an open palm when asking a question.
They project self confidence. , A neutral expression is a good default expression.
A slight smile might let people know that you are friendly and open to connecting with them.
Try to react to what other people are saying with a small nod, tilting your head sideways or smiling, or looking as if you're thinking it over. , Most people love to be paid attention.
When it is your turn to talk, ask a question about something they said such as "You mentioned .
Please tell me more about that." Such a question reassures them that you heard what they said and it gives them another chance to talk. , They don't have to be intellectual topics.
They can be about your hobbies, places you've been, sports, a TV program, a historical event or a current news story.
Prepare up to 5 sentences on a topic so that you are ready when you have to talk.
You can start with "I think is interesting because..." Don't forget to ask questions. , People are interested in other people's lives but make sure your stories are a little bit interesting and not at all embarrassing to you or to other people.
For example, it would NOT be good to say "I have to go to the bathroom every hour." It's very common to tell people about your hometown such as "I grew up in Atlanta so my accent is Southern, not Texan," or "My favorite hobby is..."
The best way to seem intellectually normal is to know what's going on in the world.
You can do this by listening to what your role models and friends are talking about, following people on Twitter, "Liking" Facebook pages on subjects that interest you so you get new stories on that subject, or watching a national newscast, reading the headlines of newspapers or magazines or domain-specific webpages. , Ask some trusted family members or friends, or professional such as counselors to let you know whether what you're doing is working.
Ask them to tell you what you should do more of, less of, or something new that you should consider doing.
About the Author
Grace Ward
Specializes in breaking down complex practical skills topics into simple steps.
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