How to Smooth Talk
Think ahead about what you want, and what you think your boss or teacher wants., Don't start the conversation immediately with "business," unless you know your boss or teacher is in a rush., Respect and honor their authority., Add careful flattery...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Think ahead about what you want
Don't just go into the talk blind.
Ask yourself what you're hoping for out of the interaction, making a clear goal before you start talking.
Even better, ask yourself what they might want out of the talk? Can you find a way to make sure everyone gets what they want? Having something to offer the other person, even if it is small or meaningless, is a great smooth talking tactic.
Are you trying to get out of trouble, and know the teacher or boss believes you should be punished? Find a way to fix the problem or remedy the solution, a plan to make things better later.
Are you asking for a favor? Find a way to make the request personal to them, showing how helping you helps them as well (you'll pay them, the project affects their neighborhood, etc.) Empathy, or the ability able to imagine things from another person's perspective, will make you an exponentially better smooth talker.
Know what they want, and it is much easier to get what you want. -
Step 2: and what you think your boss or teacher wants.
Spend some time talking, building a personal relationship, before launching into the professional one.
People are much kinder to those they feel close with, and smooth talk is the art of bringing out the best, happiest, and friendliest of everyone to make it more likely they'll help you.
Jumping right into business makes many people feel used, the exact opposite of a good smooth talker's goal., Coming out with a challenge will turn things into an argument instantly.
Instead, remain polite, submissive, and kind.
This doesn't mean you let yourself get pushed around.
Rather, it lets them feel in control, and thus more open to compromise and kindness.
The key to smooth talking
-- never get noticed.
It's easiest if you don't rock the status quo.Listen intently when they talk.
Nod along and add phrases like "that's a good point," "I hadn't thought of that," and "I respect that opinion." "I love my job," or "I really love this class!" shows that you're not trying to attack, you're trying to improve.
Remember that a smooth talker works with someone, not over them.Offer to let speak first and thank them for the chance to share your side.
Remember, you're not trying to outrank them, you're trying to talk them on your side.Always use proper titles, like Mr. and Mrs, or sir and ma'am, when appropriate. , This can quickly go from kind to creepy if you over do it, so limit yourself to a few short, quick compliments, well-separated apart.
A good rule of thumb is that, whenever you need to say anything negative, sandwich it between two short compliments.
For example: "I understand why you run such a tight ship at work, and it really makes us so productive! I'm still not sure it is fair to make us all come work on Saturday.
But I understand you're thinking about it because you want us to keep being such a great, powerful company." In your compliments, watch for telltale signs of comprehension and relaxation, such as crinkles in the corners of the eyes (a sign of a hidden smile), unclenching fists, and shoulders becoming less tense and drooping slightly.
This often means you're getting somewhere positive. , You don't want to seem evasive, leaving out large chunks, but they don't need to know what shirt you were wearing or exactly what you did when you played hooky and got caught.
Just tell your story in a basic, no-frills way, letting them ask questions if they have them.
If you're requesting help or a favor of any type remember this simple 3-part request:
Tell them the problem that needs to be solved.
If possible, show them how the problem affects them.
This could be "I cant afford to get in trouble" or "there is no product for young users." Show them a proposed "solution." Again, show how they can make it a reality, coming with ideas, not just issues.
Give them proof of your future "success." Let them see why supporting, helping, or not punishing you will lead to a better world for both you and them., Again, smooth talk is about easing your way in and out of the conversation, not rocking the boat and making a scene.
A few jokes, light laughs (even at your own expense), and small smiles will keep everyone at ease and make it much easier to make your request, ask forgiveness. "Okay, I admit that I may have had a temporary case of "bone headedness," but we both know that I have been reliable, professional, and helpful ever since I started." Remember to make eye contact when talking
-- this builds trust and companionship. , If your smooth talking works, then thank them profusely and let them know that they should come to you if they need any help.
Building up strong, lasting relationships now makes smooth talking easier in the future, so don't just take your "victory" and dash
-- it will come back to bite you next time you're around. -
Step 3: Don't start the conversation immediately with "business
-
Step 4: " unless you know your boss or teacher is in a rush.
-
Step 5: Respect and honor their authority.
-
Step 6: Add careful flattery.
-
Step 7: Keep your own discussion short and to the point.
-
Step 8: Keep the mood light
-
Step 9: even in difficult conversations.
-
Step 10: Thank them for any help they do offer.
Detailed Guide
Don't just go into the talk blind.
Ask yourself what you're hoping for out of the interaction, making a clear goal before you start talking.
Even better, ask yourself what they might want out of the talk? Can you find a way to make sure everyone gets what they want? Having something to offer the other person, even if it is small or meaningless, is a great smooth talking tactic.
Are you trying to get out of trouble, and know the teacher or boss believes you should be punished? Find a way to fix the problem or remedy the solution, a plan to make things better later.
Are you asking for a favor? Find a way to make the request personal to them, showing how helping you helps them as well (you'll pay them, the project affects their neighborhood, etc.) Empathy, or the ability able to imagine things from another person's perspective, will make you an exponentially better smooth talker.
Know what they want, and it is much easier to get what you want.
Spend some time talking, building a personal relationship, before launching into the professional one.
People are much kinder to those they feel close with, and smooth talk is the art of bringing out the best, happiest, and friendliest of everyone to make it more likely they'll help you.
Jumping right into business makes many people feel used, the exact opposite of a good smooth talker's goal., Coming out with a challenge will turn things into an argument instantly.
Instead, remain polite, submissive, and kind.
This doesn't mean you let yourself get pushed around.
Rather, it lets them feel in control, and thus more open to compromise and kindness.
The key to smooth talking
-- never get noticed.
It's easiest if you don't rock the status quo.Listen intently when they talk.
Nod along and add phrases like "that's a good point," "I hadn't thought of that," and "I respect that opinion." "I love my job," or "I really love this class!" shows that you're not trying to attack, you're trying to improve.
Remember that a smooth talker works with someone, not over them.Offer to let speak first and thank them for the chance to share your side.
Remember, you're not trying to outrank them, you're trying to talk them on your side.Always use proper titles, like Mr. and Mrs, or sir and ma'am, when appropriate. , This can quickly go from kind to creepy if you over do it, so limit yourself to a few short, quick compliments, well-separated apart.
A good rule of thumb is that, whenever you need to say anything negative, sandwich it between two short compliments.
For example: "I understand why you run such a tight ship at work, and it really makes us so productive! I'm still not sure it is fair to make us all come work on Saturday.
But I understand you're thinking about it because you want us to keep being such a great, powerful company." In your compliments, watch for telltale signs of comprehension and relaxation, such as crinkles in the corners of the eyes (a sign of a hidden smile), unclenching fists, and shoulders becoming less tense and drooping slightly.
This often means you're getting somewhere positive. , You don't want to seem evasive, leaving out large chunks, but they don't need to know what shirt you were wearing or exactly what you did when you played hooky and got caught.
Just tell your story in a basic, no-frills way, letting them ask questions if they have them.
If you're requesting help or a favor of any type remember this simple 3-part request:
Tell them the problem that needs to be solved.
If possible, show them how the problem affects them.
This could be "I cant afford to get in trouble" or "there is no product for young users." Show them a proposed "solution." Again, show how they can make it a reality, coming with ideas, not just issues.
Give them proof of your future "success." Let them see why supporting, helping, or not punishing you will lead to a better world for both you and them., Again, smooth talk is about easing your way in and out of the conversation, not rocking the boat and making a scene.
A few jokes, light laughs (even at your own expense), and small smiles will keep everyone at ease and make it much easier to make your request, ask forgiveness. "Okay, I admit that I may have had a temporary case of "bone headedness," but we both know that I have been reliable, professional, and helpful ever since I started." Remember to make eye contact when talking
-- this builds trust and companionship. , If your smooth talking works, then thank them profusely and let them know that they should come to you if they need any help.
Building up strong, lasting relationships now makes smooth talking easier in the future, so don't just take your "victory" and dash
-- it will come back to bite you next time you're around.
About the Author
Jeffrey Wright
Jeffrey Wright has dedicated 1 years to mastering lifestyle and practical guides. As a content creator, Jeffrey focuses on providing actionable tips and step-by-step guides.
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