How to Maintain Eye Contact
Relax and talk about your topic., Look between their eyes to start., Draw an imaginary inverted triangle on their face.The base of the triangle should be between their two eyes and the point of the triangle should be at their mouth or just below...
Step-by-Step Guide
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Step 1: Relax and talk about your topic.
Eye contact will come a lot more easily if you feel at ease.
Try not to get yourself too stressed out.
Stay focused on what you are trying to convey in words.
As you get into a conversational rhythm with the person you are talking to you will become more comfortable and more able to make eye contact. -
Step 2: Look between their eyes to start.
If you are too uncomfortable to look someone directly in the eye you can try looking at the person in between his or her eyes to get started.
They won’t know you aren’t looking them in the eye and once you get more comfortable with this you can start actually making eye contact.It is also best to start with people who are not intimidating to you, such as friends or parents.
If you’re talking to someone really attractive or powerful you’re less likely to feel comfortable looking them in the eye., As you talk to this person let your eyes wander between these three points.
This will make you look engaged without staring at one spot the entire time.
Rotate between the three points every five seconds or so., Maintain a balance between looking at them at them and looking away.
Try to look at them or look away at natural points in the conversation.
For example, if they say something you agree with you could try looking away and nodding your head in agreement.
Replacing eye contact with non-verbal cues is a great way to assure the other person you are paying attention. , Even if you feel uncomfortable and awkward looking people in the eyes, it is healthy to force yourself to do it.
Science tells us that making eye contact with someone is not so dissimilar to the idea of ‘keeping your eye on the ball’.
It is something that you choose to do voluntarily, and it gets easier with practice.When you are talking or listening to someone and you catch yourself looking over their head or off into the distance, force yourself to reinitiate eye contact. , While you certainly don't need to suffer through eye contact if it's jarring to you, it is helpful to accommodate non-disabled people by sending signals that tell them you're paying attention.
Look at somewhere near their face, where you can be comfortable.
You can also give other signals that you're listening, such as nodding and interjecting with questions or statements like "I see." Try looking at their...
Nose Mouth Hairline/eyebrows Chin Neckline/shirt area, unless they are wearing a low-cut shirt General direction , Studies show that East Asians desire less eye contact than other cultures.
Eye contact can even come off as angry or unapproachable.On the other hand, Westerners tend to think of eye contact as being assertive and confident.
Recognize that eye contact is rude in some disability subcultures.
Autistic people and some others find eye contact alarming and upsetting,which means it hinders a conversation instead of helping.
If you're talking to someone who avoids eye contact, it's polite to look elsewhere, such as at their hands or their shirt, so they can be comfortable. -
Step 3: Draw an imaginary inverted triangle on their face.The base of the triangle should be between their two eyes and the point of the triangle should be at their mouth or just below it.
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Step 4: Don’t look too much.
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Step 5: Make an effort.
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Step 6: Try feigning eye contact if you are disabled and find actual eye contact upsetting.
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Step 7: Understand that eye contact varies depending on culture.
Detailed Guide
Eye contact will come a lot more easily if you feel at ease.
Try not to get yourself too stressed out.
Stay focused on what you are trying to convey in words.
As you get into a conversational rhythm with the person you are talking to you will become more comfortable and more able to make eye contact.
If you are too uncomfortable to look someone directly in the eye you can try looking at the person in between his or her eyes to get started.
They won’t know you aren’t looking them in the eye and once you get more comfortable with this you can start actually making eye contact.It is also best to start with people who are not intimidating to you, such as friends or parents.
If you’re talking to someone really attractive or powerful you’re less likely to feel comfortable looking them in the eye., As you talk to this person let your eyes wander between these three points.
This will make you look engaged without staring at one spot the entire time.
Rotate between the three points every five seconds or so., Maintain a balance between looking at them at them and looking away.
Try to look at them or look away at natural points in the conversation.
For example, if they say something you agree with you could try looking away and nodding your head in agreement.
Replacing eye contact with non-verbal cues is a great way to assure the other person you are paying attention. , Even if you feel uncomfortable and awkward looking people in the eyes, it is healthy to force yourself to do it.
Science tells us that making eye contact with someone is not so dissimilar to the idea of ‘keeping your eye on the ball’.
It is something that you choose to do voluntarily, and it gets easier with practice.When you are talking or listening to someone and you catch yourself looking over their head or off into the distance, force yourself to reinitiate eye contact. , While you certainly don't need to suffer through eye contact if it's jarring to you, it is helpful to accommodate non-disabled people by sending signals that tell them you're paying attention.
Look at somewhere near their face, where you can be comfortable.
You can also give other signals that you're listening, such as nodding and interjecting with questions or statements like "I see." Try looking at their...
Nose Mouth Hairline/eyebrows Chin Neckline/shirt area, unless they are wearing a low-cut shirt General direction , Studies show that East Asians desire less eye contact than other cultures.
Eye contact can even come off as angry or unapproachable.On the other hand, Westerners tend to think of eye contact as being assertive and confident.
Recognize that eye contact is rude in some disability subcultures.
Autistic people and some others find eye contact alarming and upsetting,which means it hinders a conversation instead of helping.
If you're talking to someone who avoids eye contact, it's polite to look elsewhere, such as at their hands or their shirt, so they can be comfortable.
About the Author
Janet Foster
Creates helpful guides on organization to inspire and educate readers.
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